Do you carry 'protection'?

[La]

Even if they have a gun, run. Good chance they'll miss.

Or at least be less inclined to use it...

Agreed.

I would think that if someone is using a gun in an assault that they are using it to scare you into complying with them, otherwise they would have just shot you right off the bat. If you run away, somehow I doubt that they'll shoot at you.

[DonnaRigs]

Even if they have a gun, run. Good chance they'll miss.

Or at least be less inclined to use it...

Agreed.

I would think that if someone is using a gun in an assault that they are using it to scare you into complying with them, otherwise they would have just shot you right off the bat. If you run away, somehow I doubt that they'll shoot at you.

Besides, it is remarkably hard to hit someone in a way that will actually kill them. Don't get me wrong, I don't want to be shot, but your chances of survival go down, not up, if you comply.

[barebuns1]

I wear my road ID whenever I run. You just never know when you will have an accident. My gf bought me pepper spray when I run in Texas. I haven't decided if thats to fight of the mad dogs or mad women when they attack.

[fit-kitty]

I saw pepper spray (animal stuff) at Canadian Tire last night. Under 12$, in black bottle OR pink ( ) for the ladies!

[DougG]

I misunderstood the thread. I saw the title and was wondering what I was missing.

[phorunner]

As men we are not at anywhere near the risk that women are. Frankly I don't even think about getting attacked unless I'm in some strange city in which case I first make sure of my route. However my sister is very conscious of these risks.

Agreed.

Not to sound insensitive though, but I'm always curious and prod to ask what has happened in the past to someone to make them feel that way. A lot of the time (not all - some are legit), the stories seem like their imagination got the best of them and a harmless guy who looked awfully suspicious wasn't really doing anything - it was more of an awkward coincedence that they got onto the same subway car. Add to that a legit story from a friend who was harassed, and a few kidnap plotlines on Law & Order, and I think the worry gets slightly inflated.

Not everyone is a loose-cannon ex-marine that specialized in recon and asset recovery - most are just clumsy, un-coordinated weirdos who will go down with a swift kick to the nuts. Awareness is key - just do your best to keep your distance and stay in relatively populated areas.

[Miss*Smiles]

As men we are not at anywhere near the risk that women are. Frankly I don't even think about getting attacked unless I'm in some strange city in which case I first make sure of my route. However my sister is very conscious of these risks.

Agreed.

Not to sound insensitive though, but I'm always curious and prod to ask what has happened in the past to someone to make them feel that way. A lot of the time (not all - some are legit), the stories seem like their imagination got the best of them and a harmless guy who looked awfully suspicious wasn't really doing anything - it was more of an awkward coincedence that they got onto the same subway car. Add to that a legit story from a friend who was harassed, and a few kidnap plotlines on Law & Order, and I think the worry gets slightly inflated.

Not everyone is a loose-cannon ex-marine that specialized in recon and asset recovery - most are just clumsy, un-coordinated weirdos who will go down with a swift kick to the nuts. Awareness is key - just do your best to keep your distance and stay in relatively populated areas.

The time when you are at work alone at a clothing store of a main street in the City and a man walks in and wants to try something on (not strange, even though it's a women's clothing store) and the man proceeds to come out in a woman's shirt with nothing else on and fondling himself in front of you.

Those kinds of moments take away your sense of safety around those who "seem harmless" and makes you think your worry isn't "slightly inflated".

[phorunner]

Also, from a episode of Burn Notice - he makes a good point;

(Paraphrased)
Chases are not about speed, they're about outlasting the target. Most people sprint and get winded - the key is to keep them in your field of view and catch them as they stop to breathe.
(end Paraphrasing)

Remember, you're a runner, and you're probably better trained to run a long distance than they are. KEEP RUNNING, they're going to tire out and lose you - I doubt too many of these guys are training for marathons or halfs (if they did, they'd realize there's plenty of cute, social, single girls that they won't need to abduct)

[phorunner]

The time when you are at work alone at a clothing store of a main street in the City and a man walks in and wants to try something on (not strange, even though it's a women's clothing store) and the man proceeds to come out in a woman's shirt with nothing else on and fondling himself in front of you.

Those kinds of moments take away your sense of safety around those who "seem harmless" and makes you think your worry isn't "slightly inflated".

Agreed - that's why I never said all. That would be classified as one of the legit stories I mentioned.

[Miss*Smiles]

The time when you are at work alone at a clothing store of a main street in the City and a man walks in and wants to try something on (not strange, even though it's a women's clothing store) and the man proceeds to come out in a woman's shirt with nothing else on and fondling himself in front of you.

Those kinds of moments take away your sense of safety around those who "seem harmless" and makes you think your worry isn't "slightly inflated".

Agreed - that's why I never said all. That would be classified as one of the legit stories I mentioned.

But you did ask what could have happened in the past to make someone feel that way. Those are the kinds of moments that you are curious about, and I'm certain many (most? all?) women have had similar life events.

[phorunner]

The time when you are at work alone at a clothing store of a main street in the City and a man walks in and wants to try something on (not strange, even though it's a women's clothing store) and the man proceeds to come out in a woman's shirt with nothing else on and fondling himself in front of you.

Those kinds of moments take away your sense of safety around those who "seem harmless" and makes you think your worry isn't "slightly inflated".

Agreed - that's why I never said all. That would be classified as one of the legit stories I mentioned.

But you did ask what could have happened in the past to make someone feel that way. Those are the kinds of moments that you are curious about, and I'm certain many (most? all?) women have had similar life events.

I do ask, and in my experience, disproportionately it's happened to be more of the "creepy guy looking at me on the subway"-type stories where nothing actually happened. At least of the people I've asked.

I'm not denying there are some legit crazies out there - there are, and people should be aware. My point was, a) be aware but not afraid, b) most of them aren't superhuman

(I had a feeling I just shouldn't have commented, because this is going to get twisted up into it looking like I'm an insensitive jerk. For the record, I don't think anyone should have to endure any sort of hardships, and I'm not denying terrible things that have happened to people.)

[Jwolf]

The creepy guy I was talking about started running me and chatting; then the next thing I know he asked me to come back to his house with him after the run. He somehow thought that because I waved back at him on the previous lap that I wanted to sleep with him. Now, he did just go away when I said no, but it's just not the kind of thing I want to deal with when I'm running.

In general I'm not paranoid and some people probably think I'm not as careful as I should be- there have been a few cases recently- one about a woman being attacked and raped while running in that same area, and another about a woman runner murdered in pacific spirit park a couple years ago. But I also know these situations are rare and not exclusive to runners.

I am aware, but not afraid, and that's how I think most of us are reacting. Otherwise we'd never get out at all. I know I am much more likely to get hurt on a run by an injury, and I am prepared for that on long runs. And I would never carry any kind of a weapon.

[Miss*Smiles]

I didn't think you were insensitive. I appreciate the fact that you asking is out of curiosity. I have been "followed" only to see that the guy "following" me was headed to his car/house and wasn't following me. Yup, there are situations that raise hairs on the back of my neck that don't necessarily warrant it. Before the pervert fondled himself in front of me, I would have told you where I worked was perfectly safe. Why wouldn't I think that my workplace would be safe?

And fear can be paralyzing. When that man came out and began playing with himself and quizzing me on what I thought of the size of his johnson, I froze. I didn't know what to do. I was terrified that I was going to get attacked. You have NO idea how grateful I was to hear the door chime when other customers walked in and the man quickly changed and "made his escape". I didn't know I should have called the police.

I believe most people are good people and I trust my gut. I don't think every man that walks past me is going to attack me. But, I do feel the need to be "safe rather than sorry". I don't care if I am perceived as being overly cautious because I choose to tell someone where I am running and when I'll be back. When I lived alone I had this fear that I would die and no one would know for days... A couple years after I moved out of one of my apartments, a former neighbour told me that the man who had lived in that apartment before me had died (natural causes) and no one found him for days.... Oops I digress.

I just wanted to give you an example of why someone (a woman) might feel unsafe and at a higher risk of attack than a man, as Joe pointed out. No, I don't live my life looking over my shoulder. Yes, I try to be aware of me surroundings at all times, but I'm also not afraid to go out for a run alone. Actually, I'm more afraid that I'll have an asthma attack or sprain an ankle.

[Joe Dwarf]

My point was, a) be aware but not afraid, b) most of them aren't superhuman

They don't need to be superhuman. The average male is going to overpower (pulls figure out of ass) 90+% of women. The afore-mentioned kick to the balls is surprisingly hard to land and not guaranteed to be effective even if it does. You want to avoid the conflict. It's very easy for us as men to say "don't be afraid" but we have never walked in their shoes.

[HCcD]

Which brings me to another topic ... In retail, it should be the Manager's responsibility to have at least 2 staff (especially part timers) on shift at any given time, especially in the evening / closing shift, imo .... When I worked at the RR ... to save money ....yep, 3 hours x min wage, the Manager would always almost put me closing alone, while if a girl was working, he would always have a second person, a girl another guy working with her ... The only other p-t'er that would readily close alone by herself was Beth, before she became a cop ... Though, the Manager rarely, if ever worked/closed alone in the evening ... I guess his logic was that he was a Salaried Employee, fixed cost, so he could justify having a youg teenie-bopper working with him, "training her" as he would put it ...

[Spirit Unleashed]

"creepy guy looking at me" = time to take preventive action. So, it is a problem situation for the woman.

[Avis]

"creepy guy looking at me" = time to take preventive action. So, it is a problem situation for the woman.

Exactly so.

[scrumhalfgirl]

I don't need to have had something happen to me personally to make me aware or to highlight the need to be cautious - things have happened to other women, which means they could happen to me. Low likelihood? Sure. But a reality.

As for running away, sure, my endurance would be great if I had a 500m head start on an attacker, but if someone is right next to me, most men are going to be able to out sprint me over a couple hundred metres before the endurance factor kicks in.

[turd ferguson]

What frightens me is that we've become a society of misanthropes.

Heads down, faces into our iphones all the time, desperately avoiding human contact.

So that a person who genuinely likes people, who isn't afraid of starting a conversation with a stranger, who takes his inspiration in life from Ned Flanders, is suddenly "creepy".

There's genuinely creepy behaviour out there, I get that. But not all forms of interpersonal contact are creepy.

Or maybe they are, I should shut the hell up and stop talking to people who'd rather keep their heads down and go around in silence.

[Jwolf]

There's genuinely creepy behaviour out there, I get that. But not all forms of interpersonal contact are creepy.

No, of course it's not all- I don't think anyone is saying that. Problem is you can't always tell right off what someone's intentions are.

I tend to be friendly and trust that most people are, but sadly some people are not. And some people think that if you're being casually friendly then you're inviting more (unwanted) attention.

[fit-kitty]

As men we are not at anywhere near the risk that women are. Frankly I don't even think about getting attacked unless I'm in some strange city in which case I first make sure of my route. However my sister is very conscious of these risks.

Agreed.

Not to sound insensitive though, but I'm always curious and prod to ask what has happened in the past to someone to make them feel that way. A lot of the time (not all - some are legit), the stories seem like their imagination got the best of them and a harmless guy who looked awfully suspicious wasn't really doing anything - it was more of an awkward coincedence that they got onto the same subway car. Add to that a legit story from a friend who was harassed, and a few kidnap plotlines on Law & Order, and I think the worry gets slightly inflated.

Not everyone is a loose-cannon ex-marine that specialized in recon and asset recovery - most are just clumsy, un-coordinated weirdos who will go down with a swift kick to the nuts. Awareness is key - just do your best to keep your distance and stay in relatively populated areas.

The time when you are at work alone at a clothing store of a main street in the City and a man walks in and wants to try something on (not strange, even though it's a women's clothing store) and the man proceeds to come out in a woman's shirt with nothing else on and fondling himself in front of you.

Those kinds of moments take away your sense of safety around those who "seem harmless" and makes you think your worry isn't "slightly inflated".

Ew

[fit-kitty]

The time when you are at work alone at a clothing store of a main street in the City and a man walks in and wants to try something on (not strange, even though it's a women's clothing store) and the man proceeds to come out in a woman's shirt with nothing else on and fondling himself in front of you.

Those kinds of moments take away your sense of safety around those who "seem harmless" and makes you think your worry isn't "slightly inflated".

Agreed - that's why I never said all. That would be classified as one of the legit stories I mentioned.

For me, it was the guy pulling over onto the side of the road while I was running, then 99% sure its him in the grocery. Harmless, probally but that feeling./sense of being watched puts a weird spin on it.

[fit-kitty]

What frightens me is that we've become a society of misanthropes.

Heads down, faces into our iphones all the time, desperately avoiding human contact.

So that a person who genuinely likes people, who isn't afraid of starting a conversation with a stranger, who takes his inspiration in life from Ned Flanders, is suddenly "creepy".

There's genuinely creepy behaviour out there, I get that. But not all forms of interpersonal contact are creepy.

Or maybe they are, I should shut the hell up and stop talking to people who'd rather keep their heads down and go around in silence.

.

I definitely wouldnt go that far, and I am not afraid to go, or will change my habits. I am always one, in a store or while running, I wave at all cars or smile at people.

[OLRunner]

phorunnerI'm sorry, but you do sound insenstive. You just said that you thought that a lot of it was "imagination." I didn't imagine boys looking up my skirt and snapping my bra straps in school. You don't know what it was like being harassed by boys in school, on the bus, men at work brushing up against you etc. Being followed, and, no it was not my imagination.

[ultraslacker]

I'm with scrummy... We don't need something specific to have happened. I think it is instinctual in women (and likely serves an evolutionary purpose) since we are physically vulnerable to men. I am the kind of girl who isn't afraid to walk or run alone, even at night. But even in broad daylight and public places there is ALWAYS a thought in the back of my head to be wary of men approaching... And I do believe that women have a good internal gauge of who is creepy and who isn't, even if we can't consciously place why. Is it fair to the innocent ones? No... But it is better to be safe than sorry.

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