It started like this: my boss and Pittsburgh colleagues begging me to come to Pittsburgh to lead their teams the second week of September. I have a long standing habit of looking for races in towns where I go on business. I hardly even think about whether I want to go in a race. I just look and sign up. So, I signed up.
Then suggested to Ken that it wasn't that far from him. He signed up.
Then, I realized that this was just 2 weeks after Flatlanders in St Louis, and my foot had degenerated so far that trying a full marathon in 6 hours would be impossible. So I switched to the half.
Then, at Flatlanders, I made the decision that there was no way my achilles would ever function painlessly al long as it was hung up on a sharp piece of bone. So I found an orthopedist on the insurance web site, got in to see him and surgery is scheduled.
Then, United Airlines did a fine job of delivering me to Pittsburgh on Saturday and I had an utterly uneventful drive to Erie. Shortly after getting to my hotel, Erin was texting me about where was I. Soon, I drove over to the race site, picked up my packet and had dinner with Ken, Erin and Erin's dad. I bought a cheap sweatshirt and pants from the Erie running club and these came in very handy in the morning.
Finally, getting back to my hotel, I wondered what the real reason for this activity was. "Why did I come here?" is what I asked my innermost self. The answer was in a book I'm reading, "The Wisdom of the Overself," and also in my favorite spiritual text, "A Course in Miracles." But it a complicated answer, all wrapped up in my life's story, my spiritual training and my place in society. It is an answer that is also in the silence of the Overself, the quietness of observing and appreciating all that is.
I slept well and got up at 3:45, which was 2:45 by my body clock. I did more spiritual study, meditation and listening for answers about why I was there.
Then I jumped in the car and went over to get Ken; whom I found powering up the road to my hotel so I had to turn around and go back to get him. Then we drove to the race and got parked. I thought it was chilly outside so we sat in the dark car and talked for at least an hour. I heard alot about Ken and his life. About 6:30, he took off for the johns and then to warm up. I continued to sit in the car for another 30 min. Finally, I too went to the john and then walked over to the start.
At the start, I did my stretching and hit the bushes for a last minute pee. I found Ken and wished him luck. He asked if my foot was ok. I probably said yes, but actually, my foot is never ok these times.
Anyway, soon the gun went off and I started jogging. It was a beautiful course. I soon found myself traveling back and forth with several people going about the same speed as me. We had fun joking about our speed, especially when we took gels. Haha, like we are really going to speed up now.
I had decided that this would be my last race or run before surgery, so might as well jog the whole thing, which is what I did. I got to see the back of the marathon winner, and about 100 other marathoners. Some of those backs and butts were…..distracting. Erin passed me too. I had been watching for him and was glad when he said hi.
About 1 mile from the finish, I saw Ken waiting for me. He jogged me in. I could hardly wait to finish.
Why was I there? To listen to Ken’s story. To high five Erin. To give the guys at work something to talk about this week. To ponder my running career. I don’t know if it is over, but it will at least need a transformation. This situation was much different from a month ago in Wyoming. I felt so triumphant then as I came down the mountain, so happy with my time. Now, I need to quietly slip away, letting go.
I think I know why I am here. But the answer is not a sound bite.
Spirit out.
